Maybe...

thoughts on uncertainty (& an anniversary)

Have you ever heard the story of the Chinese farmer? I first heard it listening to one of Tara Brach’s talks. In Googling the origin, it’s hard to find anything definitive. The version I’ve heard is most similar to the one quoted on this site (and below) and attributed to Alan Watts. Another version uses the wording “Good Luck, Bad Luck, Who Knows” instead of “maybe.” I prefer the “maybe” version. For me, it more succinctly conveys the reality of uncertainty and not knowing.

The Story of the Chinese Farmer

Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all of his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.” The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”

The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.” The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe.”

The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad — because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune.

— Alan Watts

I was thinking of this recently because of a disappointment. An opportunity I’d been hoping for - and put energy, time, and thought into - wasn’t offered to me. Is that too bad? Maybe. Or maybe not. To be clear, I don’t necessarily believe something better is going to come along. That particular opportunity is closed. And we’ll see. I can be disappointed while also realizing the uncertainty of all things. So, maybe.

We don’t know. And the older I get, the more I realize that. The less I cling to certainty.

milkweed seed pod on glass table

On another note, it’s the six month anniversary of this newsletter. I first posted Welcome to In Between on April 23, 2023. It’s been interesting to learn a new platform, and I haven’t explored all the features yet. I’ve enjoyed the dialogue, whether readers have commented here or mentioned my writing in conversation. Thanks for reading my words!

***

Today I definitely feel uncertainty. I don’t know what to write here. What to say. It feels discordant to write about things like joy and gratitude right now. People are dying. Bombs are falling. War is raging.

And still our lives go on. This weekend, I spent time with beloved family and friends. I soaked in crisp sunshine and the blazing colors of fall leaves. I watched hopeful seeds blowing and dancing in the wind.

Thanks again for reading.

Gratefully,

Mary